Margaret death leaves way clear for £1m Royal accumulator bet

While Royal watchers mourned the death of Princess Margaret over the weekend, one man in a sleepy village in Tyneside was unable to contain his excitement.

"I'm gonny get me a million pounds man," exclaimed Jeff Carter to no one in particular when we arrived at the Red Lion in Ogle. Jeff was a popular man, having bought drinks for everyone since Saturday lunchtime thanks to his Royal death accumulator bet — worth £1 million — which he now looks certain to collect.

"Aye, it's true man," Jeff told us. "I had this dream like about seven year ago that Princess Diana was gonny pop her clogs man. So I went down to Ladbrokes like and I said to the man 'What odds you give me that Princess Diana like is going to die soon man?' and he gave me this accumulator bet like."

Ladbrokes had refused to accept a bet on the death of Princess Death but did offer a four-death accumulator bet to the value of £1 million. In order for Jeff to collect, first Princess Diana, then Princess Margaret then the Queen Mum and the Queen herself would need to die. If they failed to die in that order, the bet would end and Jeff would lose his £40 base payment.

With the Queen Mum (gawd bless yer ma'am) now aged 101 and increasingly fragile, it would take some lone assassin targeting Liz Two in her Jubilee year to prevent Jeff's third prediction from coming true. Then it's just a matter of hoping none of Liz Two's children meet a premature end for Jeff to cash in.

The incredible £1 million sum may seem daft in retrospect but Royal expert Sir James Watherlington-Smythe told us that when the bet was placed in 1995, the odds on it happening were almost non-existent. "Well, in 1995, Diana was fit as a fiddle and shagging some rich playboy or rugby star or something," he told us. "Meanwhile, Margaret was in rude health."

Despite being a chain smoking drunk, Margaret showed no sign of susceptibility to strokes at the time. In the end, she managed three before finally passing away at 6.30am on Saturday.

And then who could have foreseen the tragic events of 1997 when Diana's body impacted into a concrete pillar leaving her dead as a dodo?

Jeff Carter, that's who.