Anti-globalisation forces slam increasing globalisation of anti-globalisation movement

Leading figures from the anti-globalisation movement yesterday warned that it was in danger of becoming globalised, ruling out any part it could play in the fight against globalisation.

"Our main message was that people and governments cannot give up control of their lives to those unelected, unaccountable groups who insist on changing the laws and lives of people for their own ends," said Megan Bellows, director of WASRNMHFPSU (We Are So Right No Matter How Few People Support Us).

"Then someone told me that 'Hey, like, no one elected us either man, like, don't we want to force our own political and environmental policies down their throats like some blood-sucking corporate stooge'. Which of course was exactly what we wanted. Which needed globalisation. But then that can't be right because we're anti-globalisation, man," said Bellows.

And with those words, the movement renowned for its logical, consistent and coherent presentation of ideas and opinions had no choice but to admit that it had become its own enemy and so must be campaigned against by walking down main roads with cardboard and getting stoned.

The result is that many of the current anti-globalisation groups have now reformed themselves into anti-anti-globalisation collectives. However they vehemently deny that the double negative is a sign of support for globalisation — rather a double affirmation of not supporting globilisation, since this is what they oppose.