I’m at work. I’m bored. Make me laugh.

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The Wonderful World of Bono — Greenland and Iceland

I'm sure that some of you find it strange that I have chosen to pass judgement on the largely inoffensive Greenland and Iceland.

Actually, I'm not going to talk about Greenland at all. Amazingly, I do not have an opinion on the place, in common with just about everyone else on the planet.

No, I intend to concentrate on Iceland, home of elfin chanteuse Bjork. It has come to my attention that the said Bjork has been doing a bit of freelance punditry of her own, largely relating to ecological matters. Let me just say this: the Icelandic pop punditry must stop, and it must stop now.

To qualify as a true roving pundit you must fulfil the following criteria:

• At least thirteen platinum albums
• Citizenship of a country which has at one time been occupied by the British army

Since Iceland has not, to my knowledge, ever been under the heel of British imperialist aggression, the country's recording artists are advised to refrain from expressing opinions on matters about which they know absolutely nothing. Thank you.

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