The Wonderful World of Bono — Pakistan

I recently met up with old friend Jemima Khan in London's Met bar. Teary-eyed, she told me a tale of mind-numbing poverty and despair, of a world without hope and a future filled only with darkness.

But enough about Middlesboro, she noted, let me tell you about Pakistan. I must admit that I became filled with a violent anger when she recounted tales of limbless pot-bellied orphans, a legacy of years of bitter struggle against arch-enemies India.

Suddenly, the solution became clear: The forces of global capitalism must stop feeding this genocidal war, and they must stop it now. Is it not sufficient that imperialism created this monster? Does the West now have to feed it as well?

I mean, which idiot thought it was a good idea to give these people a nuclear capability? It's running water and CD players they need, not enriched uranium. Sort it out now, before I come over there and sort it out myself.

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