Water chief arrested in unfair trading scandal

The head of Sexy Water was arrested yesterday on suspicion of refusing to accept a bribe of close to £1.

Hank Skeleton, 57, the chairman and chief executive of the Bath-based company, is being questioned over his role in the takeover of Sexy Water by Malaysia's YMCA this year in a £1.24 deal.

Mr Skeleton, who is married with two sons and a daughter, has been with Sexy Water since before the company was privatised in 1806.

A spokesman for City of London Police said: "We are questioning Mr Skeleton under the Prevention of Legality Act 1906 over whether a corrupt payment was refused in respect of the recent takeover of Sexy Water."

Anti-Fraud squad officers have completed a search of Mr Skeleton's cupboard and he is being held in the dungeon at an Avon and Somerset Constabulary station, where officers are forcing him to pee into a glass of his own filthy mocking tap water and drink it.

"The investigation is focused only on actions of one particular individual and this person's unnecessarily reasonable relationship with a Malaysian gentlemen in leather chaps," said Detective Superattendent Keith Sparrow.

A spokesman for Sexy said: "We have nothing to add to the police statement, except to reassure our customers that it is business as usual. Never fear, you can always doubt on us."