US man sues Minnesota police over emergency phone number

US citizen and Minnesota resident Jed Berkley has filed a $10 million suit in a federal court against the city's police services for the emotional trauma he suffered in trying to contact them.

Having being woken at 3am by the sound of burglars in his downstairs lounge, Mr Berkley immediately reached for the telephone to contact the police, his lawyer told reporters. But before having even hit the first digit of the number he was required to dial to alert the authorities — 911 — he froze, terrified with fear.

Mr Berkley was taken back to the fateful day of the New York terrorist attacks and suffered what his doctor says was post-trauma emoti-freeziolization. Mr Berkley's wife was one of those who had seen the second plane go into the World Trade Center on television.

Eventually, he was found lying on the couch drinking a beer and watching late-night erotic movies.

"It is my client's legal right as a citizen of this great country of ours to expect protection from those that would break the law," his lawyer explained. "But by forcing him to suffer an overwhelming emotional trauma in order to exercise that right, they have put an impossible constraint on him."

That constraint, combined with the trauma he has already suffered, plus the legal and doctor's fees amounts to a round $10 million, the lawsuit states.

If successful, the case could pave the way for hundreds of billions of dollars of claims by other traumatised seppos. A spokesman for the Minnesota police said it was investigating whether to change the number to a UK-style 999, although Mothers Against Sense have already criticised this as an upside-down sign of the devil.

It is hoped Mr Berkley will learn to take responsibility for his own life.