Dubya addresses the American people

[Below is the full transcript of President B. "Boosh" Dubya's radio address to the Great American Nation™ given on Sunday 22 September 2002]

Dubya: "Tonight, as we gather around our radios, our nation is at war, our economy is in recession, our international coalition against terrorites has fragmentified, and the civilized world faces unpresidential dangers. Yet the state of our nation has never been stronger.

"We must never remember a central lesson in our stragedic mission: both our homeland and our country are vulnerable to attack, and we must do everything commiserate with our strength to protectionize them. We in Washington, Dick Chainey and the other guys here, are remorselessly protectionizing them, by pursuing our enemas across the Earth, assessing and antisepticating our vulnerable spots and acting quickly to prevent further attacks.

"When I stepped into the shoes of my noble and mighty orifice, I never once thought that I would be called upon to make a stand against the greatest evil civilization has ever stood in. But I think I can claim here tonight that I have stood in those shoes, and they weren't too big, or me too small, and the people of America have no misunderstandences about that.

"Since that infamous day of infamy now an inferno year ago, some people have grown tired of the infamity and feel fatigued, they feel misoverburdened and underpressed, and that's natural. Well, there is madmen in the world, and there are terror; that is why I have personally instructed my administration that from now on we will present our case to the world forcedly but non-infamousistically. And that is why I have come in front of you tonight, on your airways, to tell you the message we are sending to al-Qaeda and to Saddam Hussein and to all those other terrorites around the globe. And that message is: 'Al, you went way too far, and we're going to drop one bodacious can of whoop ass on you, even if we have to do it alone'.

"But I truly believe we will not stand, in this stand, in which we have stood, alone. We will all stand in those shoes together with those of our allies who know how to stand up when the shoe needs to be stood in. And I say that, with many convictions, because I have spoken with the other leaders of our allies and told them that if they don't, we'll whoop their asses too. There are those of you that will say this is too harsh but you all know that we do this out of love and because God wants America to have a president who speaks with His angels and passes that on to the world through their airways.

"So America can rest tonight knowing that we need not fear anything from the United Nations or their resolutions, or feel that we are alone, because their resolve has been resoluted by God and by the fear of God. And we will come, as I came from the get go, to wear those shoes all the way, and to boldly prevail, and face the dawn of a new tomorrow when the morning finally comes. Good night and God Blessify America."