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Networks plan Washington sniper spin-off show

US TV companies look set to cash in on enormous ratings success of the Washington sniper drama.

During the crisis, 97 per cent of the terrified US population spent an average of 23.7 hours per day watching fearful news bulletins from behind armoured sofas as the authorities struggled to apprehend the culprits. Networks now hope to recapture the spirit of nationwide hysteria with gripping reality TV game show Beat The Moose.

The show will feature a dozen US citizens, four celebrities and two retired FBI investigators who will scratch their heads as disgruntled ex-servicemen go on a rampaging orgy of murderous serial mayhem. All of the contestants will be given the same evidence as the police, and they will race to see who can cage the perpetrators first.

Each day viewers will be able to ring a "hot line" to vote off the investigator who is performing the worst, according to the audience.

While some have condemned the show as "prurient", "immature," "pathetic," "bad taste," and "a fuc*king awful bucketload of shit that betrays the sickness of our modern age", other critics are rapt. "I'd give it two thumbs up — and I can't get my thumbs any higher!" said Roshyen Zict, television reviewer for Arizona's Daily Lynchmob. "It's educational and fun!"

TV executives have defended the show. "Beat The Moose is our way of giving something back to the community, to the moms and pops out there, who are still too frightened to fill up with a tank of gas in case they get popped with a .22 in the back of the skull and have their brains smeared all over the pump," said one.

Rapper Ice-T has already agreed to present the show. "From my fictional appearances in movies such as Boyz N The Hood, I have a strong background in dealing with shootings — which will come in handy," he smiled.

The company behind the show has meanwhile refused to rule out a possible special appearance by the real snipers John Muhammad and John Lee Malvo. "It's depends if they can get time off," one executive told us. "But we've got our fingers crossed."

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