I’m at work. I’m bored. Make me laugh.

Trawl Rockall for:

UK heading for news shortage crisis

A shock report published today by the prestigious Loughborough Media Studies institute points to an alarming drop in British news.

The report revealed that news from the UK has fallen by almost 60 per cent and if this trend were to continue at present rates there could be no proper news at all by the year 2023.

Reacting to news of the report, Mark Soup of the National Association of Journalists said: "This report is startling but not surprising. We have been calling on the government to act for many years."

Citing the burgeoning internet and a massive growth in satellite and cable TV, Mr Soup lamented: "This is the worst crisis ever to hit the UK industry. By the time mainstream journalists get hold of a news story it has already been public for several days. Our members are increasingly forced to use shoddy foreign news and fill up the rest of the space with sad items about 'a report out today'."

The report indicated that the incidence of foreign news has indeed increased and now stands at a record 64 per cent. A spokesman for the Ministry of Communications and Media said: "This is a worrying trend, but you have to realise that this is not just a UK problem. News has been declining steadily in many areas of the world such as Scandinavia and New Zealand and it's really a world-wide problem."

"We are also very concerned at the extent to which we rely on imported news from the Middle East where there has been huge surplus for years," the spokesman continued. "The consequences for the UK economy of a sudden news dearth could be severe, so we will be working hard with the UN and our US allies to ensure that the region is kept well supplied with events."

 Email an enemy  Pub-friendly printable version  ‘The Arts’ index page