US claims thousands of Islamic terrorists killed

The devastating effects of the recent tsunami which laid waste large areas of Indonesia have brought surprisingly positive side-effects, a US military analyst claimed last week. Speaking at Jakarta's The War Against Terror (TWAT) conference yesterday, Col Jeb Bush noted: "The CIA estimates that 10 per cent of a predominantly Muslim population are potential terrorists. If the tsunami killed 100,000 people in Indonesia alone, then that has taken out 10,000 suicide bombers who would inevitably have caused another 9/11, or at the very least done some serious damage to a couple of cars in central Baghdad."

Jakarta TWAT has not been as heavily publicized as the main Tsunami Donors' Conference that is currently also taking place in the Indonesian capital. The attendees of TWAT include many committed democracies such as Azerbaijan, Jordan and Pakistan.

In a later discussion, a speaker from the Indonesian Interior Ministry confirmed Col Bush's assertions. Maj Gen Susilo BamBam Yudho said that the tsunami had effectively drowned any Aceh hopes for separation from Indonesia. The Free Aceh Movement (Gerakan Aceh Merdeka, or GAM) has been leading an armed resistance since 1976 against the state. But, said Maj Gen Yudho, the Indonesian army could never compete with the complete destruction carried out by the tsunami — even after years of committed training in places such as East Timor. GAM was last year reported to have hosted al-Qaeda training camps which had been targeted for a visit by US stealth aircraft and helicopter gunships bearing airborne death "as soon as we're done in with Iran and Syria", as one grim-faced Marine commander put it.

Though the TWAT conference concentrated on global Islamic terrorism, a delegate from the Sri Lankan Army Intelligence sought to widen the geographic impact to encompass non-Muslim world-wide separatist movements. Dr Muttiah Muralitharan reminded delegates that Hindu members of the Tamil Tigers pioneered the popular suicide-bombing technique, and that many of them had also died in the tsunami. "The Sri Lankan army's job has been simplified massively," he said with a wry smile.

Previously

• Suicide bomber decimates London radio station
• So, what are your chances of being suicide bombed?
• Palestinian bomb cat picture shocks civilised world