Frank Skinner salutes Hull City AFC

Hull City AFC, who hit the headlines for the first time ever due to the disgracefully insensitive behaviour of their supporters last weekend, were once again involved in amazing scenes on Saturday. A large travelling contingent made the trip to Molineux down the M62, M18, M1, M42, M6, M54 and A449 to watch their side take on Glenn Hoddle's able-bodied, God-fearing men. Amidst calls for their supporters to be barred from all away grounds save Millwall's New Den, Hull manager Peter Taylor had pleaded for calm and an opportunity for cooler heads to prevail. In the end, even he could not have claimed to have expected to witness what took place on Saturday at Molineux.

"I've never experienced anything like that in all my years involved in football," said Wolves captain and great-great-grandfather Paul Ince. BBC pundit and professional facial hair expert Mark Lawrenson continued: "We all expected the Wolves support to have a real go at the Hull fans but they simply had the wind knocked out of their sails and didn't know how to react." With the majority of the Hull end full two hours before kick-off, bemused Wolves supporters arrived to chants of: "Would you like to take our sisters out for drinks?" and "Please consider coming to visit Humberside, it's such a lovely place and we'd love to see you, you can all stay round ours" to the tune of Coldplay's weepy In My Place.

Shocked onlookers included Frank Skinner — a confessed West Bromwich Albion supporter — "When I realised there might be television crews at Molineux I simply couldn't resist coming to prove what a regular chap I am," said the comic whose other half is swarthy David Baddiel. "The noise the Hull support made along with the refreshingly friendly tone and spirit of camaraderie certainly took some of the edge off the sound kicking I was receiving off the good people of Wolverhampton," dribbled the hideously-accented Brummie clown.

Hull midfielder Nick "Nicky" Barmby, who was once a good footballer, said he was not surprised by the reaction of his home town supporters. "I'm not surprised by the reaction of my home town supporters." Barmby said. "Hull AFC has the best supporters in the world," he beamed, showing a good eye for a footballing cliché. "Last week was such an anomaly and was a result of a Huddersfield Town firm getting past the stewards at The Kingston Communications Stadium," he concluded, helpfully.

Hull AFC Inter-City Firm Chairwoman Gladys Pipplebottom, hoarse from singing herself silly in support of her side remarked: "It was important we put Hull back on the map. It's such a lovely, scenic place with so much opportunity for young people and a tremendous history of culture and The Arts," said the octogenarian Mother's Union representative for Humberside and volunteer fire-fighter. "The people of Hull are some of the warmest, funniest, most hospitable folk you will ever meet and it was such a shame a few bad apples ruined the day for the vast majority," said Pipplebottom while knitting a stripy jumper for her new granddaughter. "I have already spoken to the rest of the Hull AFC Inter-City Firm and we're booked to go to Huddersfield on the train to kick fuc*k out of the cun*ts. The way we've planned it we can stop over in Leeds en route and bash fuc*k out of those fuc*king bastards too."

Previously

• England hooligans in Spanish rampage shame
• Juventus fans shame beautiful game — again
• Everton fans will sue over Man U Goodison Park outrage