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'I love to go naked', admits fully-clothed Middlemiss

Jayne Middlemiss, the highly-talented winner of top TV entertainment Celebrity Love Island has admitted she loves walking around NAKED.

The sexy TV presenter admitted to In Denial magazine: "I love being nude. I wander around naked all the time."

We contacted Middlemiss's agent, who told us: Oh, yeah. Jayne hates clothes. She loves being naked and, actually, would wander around naked all the time if she wasn't contracted to wear clothes."

A top psychologist told The Rockall Times: "The desire to walk around naked is common among celebrities, who often succumb to an even stronger desire to inform women's magazines of the fact when they have a new television series coming up. I'd think up a name for this syndrome if I could be bothered."

Naturally, Ms Middlemiss will not be appearing naked on a TV screen near you in the near future, despite her yearning to cast aside her apparel and let it all hang loose. Accordingly, we at The Rockall Times hereby present our artist's impression of how we believe Jayne might look without clothes in a variety of scenarios: at the Oscars; taking a well-earned break from filming on Celebrity Love Island; and fighting insurgents in Iraq. Phwoooar!

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