There’s fuc*k all on Rockall   57°35’48”N 13°41’19”W
Contact The Rockall Times Dramatic pictures of our 2003 assault on Rockall
  Monday 21st November 2005  Society   Powered by Yeast Logic
[E] [P] [I]

US Democrats attack 'immoral' secret war

How was this ever allowed to occur?
by Judd Jerry III

Leading members of the Democratic Party have launched a major campaign against a recently-discovered conflict involving US forces abroad which has apparently proved unpopular with potential voters.

Speaking before the powerful Senate Obfuscation Committee, Senator Hiram Shitkicker (D) announced to worried colleagues: "We now find, after several years' secrecy, that a large number of American troops have been involved in combat operations in a country a long way away from the US of A. How was this ever allowed to occur?"

Even now it is unclear exactly what method President Bush was able to adopt to conceal the enormity of what was going on, thereby denying the Democrats the opportunity to take firm stance against the war and demand that troops be immediately shipped home.

Moreover, in what is being seen in Democrat circles as a classic example of tedious political nitpicking, the White House publicly noted that Senator Shitkicker (along with many others in his party) did in fact vote in favour of an invasion a few years ago.

However, in a powerful rebuttal of the accusation on the popular American current affairs programme Up Your Ass, Senator Shitkicker pointed out that the only reason he voted in favour was that he had "never previously heard of Ey-rack" and was simply "voting with public opinion". Now that very public opinion — from the gay bars of San Fran to the lofts of Manhattan via the trailer parks of Idaho — has decided it doesn't much like Iraq after all, Shitkicker clearly feels morally obliged to bring all of his party's political weight to bear on the matter.

"This war is wrong, morally indefensible and a tragedy for the American people," Shitkicker declared on Up Your Ass, while cautiously eyeing a live approvals-ratingometer clamped next to the autocue.

Previously

 Posse Rispek Checker