Cameron piles into UKIP

Shiny new Tory supreme David Cameron got himself into a spot of bother earlier this month when he described the UKIP party as "fruitcakes, loonies and closet racists, mostly".

A UKIP spokesbastard, Baronet Oswald Ernest Mosely (no relation) stated: "We in the UKIP are a credible and viable opposition party to the mainstream. We live in the real World and can live with the loony epithet."

Mr. Mosely continued: " We can even deal with the vague fruitcake moniker but honestly, what is it with this 'mostly' business? What sort of a slur is that? If Mr. Cameron wants to get on in politics He is going to have to do a darn sight better than that. And as for 'closet racists', piffle!"

Sucking in a lungful of air and turning purple, Mr. Mosely then ranted: "There is nothing closet about UKIP!"

This is not the first time that Cameron has said things he rather should not have, shortly after winning the tight race for Conservative El Presidente he likened New Labour to a "bunch of underhand, scheming sleaze merchants", and described Tony Blair himself as "a cun*t".

Previously

• Enraged exorcists savage UKIP
• Jacques Chirac joins UKIP
• Joan Collins joins UKIP