Scientists develop 'cloak of invisibility'

Now you see it, now you don't

by Greg Doublewank

A joint US and British team of scientists have successfully tested a cloaking device they claim can "hide" an object by bending microwaves around it.

Although in its infancy, this embryonic technology is said to be making US Military supremos harder than a North Korean nuclear bunker.

"The possibilities are endless," stated head boffin, Professor H. Potter. "With this technology at a military's disposal, you could theoretically hide bombers, tanks, even large ships such as aircraft carriers."

Our science and technology reporter, Jocelyn Thrutch, was present at the demonstration, where a small copper disc was made to "disappear". Scientist Dr. A. Dumbledore explained: "This phenomenon is best described in the analogy of water moving around a smooth rock. When water recombines, having passed around the rock, someone looking downstream would never guess it had passed around an obstruction, lending an apparent perception of invisibility."

The US Army's General V. Oldermort enthused: "Why with this here deevice attached to say, the 1st US Armoured Division, we could sneak up right on top of old Kim and give him one straight in the ass! Where do I sign?!"

British military observers were however more sanguine in their endorsement of the new technology and it's application. "Not having a great deal of military hardware to begin with," murmured Major-General R. Weasley, "I cannot see any benefit in spending billions of tax-payers pounds in hiding a couple of Challengers and an old wheelbarrow anyway."

There is no civilian potential for this type of exotic technology on the cards at the moment, although Professor Potter joked: "I imagine every schoolboy would leap at the chance at being able to raid the Tuck Shop unseen!" Hmm….

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Scientists develop 'cloak of invisibility'

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